Posted by: exileindixie | April 15, 2010

Span v Cuddyer

Back when, there was this (arguably) fantastic sit-com called Dinosaurs.  It explored typical early 90’s sit-com semi-heavy / nearly-after-school-specially moral and ethical dilemmas, except with animatronic dinosaurs instead of Bob Sagat and Mark-Paul Gosselaar.  So it was right in my wheel house, and, based on conversations with many of my peers, mine alone.

In one episode, Earl, the blue collar father, discovers something called “the happy plant.”  If you eat the happy plant, you are happy and carefree, but also detached from reality and unable to perform basic familial and occupational responsibilities.  Get it?  Under the influence of the plant, Earl proclaims, “This is the happiest moment of my life. No wait, this is. No wait, this is.”

That quote is a metaphor for how I feel watching Span and Cuddyer at-bats these days.  “Denard Span is my favorite baseball player of all time.  No wait, Michael Cuddyer is.  No way, Denard Span is.  No wait…” Except this happens over the course of several hours.  I’m a lot of fun to watch baseball with.  I’m sure I will make all kinds of friends when I move south.

(ed. note: the Span and Cuddyer sentiments are not at all related to any sort of happy plant.  The author has been clean for years, yo.)


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s


%d bloggers like this: